Posted by: jruthkelly | June 24, 2010

Mini-Stroke

My mom, who is 71, had a stroke while we were camping in the N. Ga. mountains. My time here at their home has suddenly extended itself. But she’s walking, talking and functioning fine enough. A slight wobble in her gait. We’re waiting for doctors to rule out any further risk beyond the typical post-stroke risk. It started as a disturbance in her vision much like a pre-migraine. I know it well myself. But this got worse and stayed. And this was apparently when the stroke occurred. In the visual cortex. Her vision is all fragmented and flashing neon brightness. It exhausts her. Her question: Is this permanent? Doc’s response: The brain has an amazing capacity to heal itself. She and all of us here are in shock. This is a go-getter woman. Tough. Takes good care of herself. Both her parents died suddenly and horribly of heart disease undetected. She’s made sure not to let that happen, surpassing their longevity by many years already.

This has been, in spite of it all, a healing time for us. When you run out of the hills of Georgia and fast to the seemingly greener hillsides of North Carolina, you leave a bit of a track, a wake. That’s especially true for me since I left in total frustration with life and with my history. I was none too sure of my religion or. Or. Looking at old photos last night it struck me, once again, how much has changed. I was a shadow of who I am now when I left here. My mom has only recently begun to recover from the whiplash of such a stark change. How does she talk to me about Jesus anymore when she knows I’m just not there now? It’s not easy but she respects where I am, grieves it some. And she was never the type of person I could hide such changes from, ever. We’ve hobbled along, testing and re-testing our relationship these past 5 years especially. It’s been a study in courage for both of us.

So, holding hands, providing Reiki, laughing, filling out her forms for her…as sorry as we all are that it has had to be like this, I know she felt the deeper healing as much as I did. We’ve spoken openly about the hurts between us, found peace together. You can’t ask for more than that. No, actually you can. You can ask for a couple more decades of restoring what can never be destroyed. That’s all I ask.

On with it…

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Responses

  1. Hey Lady! Happy 4th! 4th in the South always reminds me of watermelon and swanky heat and family. Hoping Your mother is progressing wonderfully still, and that if You guys partake, Your watermelon is crisp and sweet! Big Hugs and Namaste. :)

    • It was a fine 4th…quiet (but with family) and much appreciated after all the excitement. But no watermelon… :(
      And my mom is recovering well. I’m hoping my efforts to get her house in tip top shape will keep her resting now that I’m back home!
      oxo…

  2. Hey Beautiful Lady. Gosh. Wow, and Geez. My heart goes out to You. I send You and Your Mother and Family MUCH Love and Light. I hope she is feeling better. The whole thing is wild. You take off for the mountains and end up roaming quiet peaks and valleys within Yourself and Your dance with Your mother. That’s cowrazy profound. Very, very beautiful. I love that Your mother is allowing You to practice Reiki on her, and that although she grieves whatever changes You’ve made, that she honours them. I wish You many, many years more of dancing with her….I’m sending You HUGE HUGS and will check back in…..love You…Namaste. :)

    • thank you bliss…we’ve been crazy busy going to specialists. the neurologist says she’s a lucky gal and should expect full recovery. we’re all very glad this has been as mild as it’s been and appreciate the opportunity to show our love. so…challenging but rewarding moments here. in the meantime, your overflowing bounty is a treat! big big hugs to you…

      • Gosh! GREAT to hear!!! I’m so happy for All of You! Thanks for the update!!! Walking away still sending Hugs and Love and Light!!! :) Namaste.

  3. My regards, love and heart to you and your loved ones in this difficult, albeit healing time.

    • thank you violi…your presence and kind words are a balm. glad you dropped in. hugs…

  4. http://jingleyanqiu.wordpress.com/2010/06/22/the-celebrate-poet-of-may-award-and-more/

    three awards on the bottom,
    Happy Saturday!

  5. prayers for your mom…

  6. I am sorry to hear of your Mother’s stroke. I am sending light. This post brought back memories. My sister became a Reiki healer (did I say that correctly?) or has her license to practice and teaches yoga to special needs children as well as adults. She went through a spiritual enlightenment following our Mother’s death and has shared much with me and I embrace so much of what I have been able to learn. My Father called me a couple months after Mother’s passing and shared with me that he was worried about my sister. I asked him why. He said, “She told me she is sending me light for the highest good.” I asked him what was wrong with that? There was a long pause at the other end of the line, then a chuckle. He said, “Well, I guess, nothing. It’s kind of nice.” We came to the conclusion that the changes she was going through was actually not going to hurt any of us or her either. In fact, as the years have passed, it has brought us all into a more comfortable way of caring. Just because someone has different beliefs doesn’t mean we need to worry. This was a beautiful post and I hope sharing a similar experience helps.

    • This is such comfort, leslie. Thank you. We’re muddling through all of this and finding opportunities to ease into, as you say here, more comfortable ways of care. I’m proud of how my parents are adjusting to the changes in their daughters and in their own lives. The love grows. Now we just need to help my mom work through this visual disturbance.
      Your presence is a balm…

    • and yes, you spelled it right. :0) I’m Reiki II and wanting to move on to master level. it’s a powerful healing force and i’ve had tremendous success with it. so pleased my mom is accepting of it! you can’t argue with the “highest good.” i remind her that the bible says that every good thing comes from god…. :)

      • I visit you because of the things you share and your incredible writing skills. I have sensed your familiarity, so strongly, with the things my sister speaks of and that is a good thing. I strive to learn and to understand more fully those things close to our souls. Your blog is a way of seeing things that, in a way, make sense of nonsense and I thank you for that.

        • it means the world to me that you’ve found my blog worth including in your soulful discoveries. your own artistic flow pours a feast of soul and hope for me. big hugs to you…


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