Under Leaves…

Under leaves those lies and shows you thought I’d grow up to blow
on my knees perpetually for your testimony of delusions,
the paradise you claimed and named as real,
all those lies and shows, all their fangs and claws,
chains and saws dissolve around me.

Under leaves I am.

Under leaves these cells sing, sound and bellow something never meant to be silent or still.

Under leaves every fiber of me hums, shouts, and pounds a drum no one can claim.

Under leaves and on their scatterings my feet bare and drinking, gulping up the gobs, sigh.

Under leaves the chunks and corpses sink into dirt, all the lies gone.

Under leaves the bones rumble to life, a resurrection unrelenting.

Leave me here, I’ll dance, I’ll laugh at the scars and all the servitude scenarios.

Fly these arrows to the missionary madness, leave me to the sane and true.

Under leaves you could never be.

Under leaves I am.

Photo by J. Ruth Kelly, All Rights Reserved, 2018

Trails Lead…

maybe these trails lead
somewhere deep within love’s soul
where a lil girl leaps
and heart plays freely
skipping along her power
and the trees sing sight
faeries’ smiles light paths
as eternal youth blossoms
from within time’s keep
and a woman’s face
turns to decades trailing life
her roots finding gold
for in these woods, we’re never old

j. ruth kelly, 2017, all rights reserved


Our Basket

Can we fit these singing mountains inside the basket
your heart reeled me into?
Or maybe the rivers, the sunsets and the coyote?

photo by j. ruth kelly, 2017, all rights reserved, Taos, NM

Can the energy flowing between our hearts, our minds,
our body
fit inside or…
will the weave burst, filling our laughter up all the way
to the top of every
split second of
divine timing?

Everywhere I turn the words fall silent, singing depths and I’m left
with gratitude.
For you. And.
For those friends who are closer than the closest.

Our basket tips, overflowing with abundance,
like the way your eyes drew me to you
and the way my tears fell easily with the friend of friends who
brought me to your heart, to hers, to my own heart…
and to this place,
this now…

this forever measures out the next time and place
of happy faces pushed against each other,
skin blending souls blurring lines and distinctions…

’til we find we’re scrambling
for more to fill and overflow
the reunion of souls.


Real Life with Goddess…


Real life with goddess includes all day events for Lego League adventures, afternoon discussions rolling into the evening and on until bedtime because life can be that upsetting for teenagers and then all day stand and deliver co-coaching a beautiful birth while marveling at the wonder of the feminine divine not so much shining but bearing down for one more push before the truly gorgeous baby girl shows her face to the world. A face covered in womb’s stories, a beauty so gut-raw real sometimes only the tough ones can stand it.

Goddess is gory glory, has anyone else noticed? Shining glamour notions vary from culture to subculture to neighborhood to home to woman. And they don’t even begin to make up the real story of real life with goddess. We deal. We make it real and then we roll out the red carpet for things that matter hugely. How many women are out there mopping up the mess in the wake of marriage gone way wrong, nursing the bruised, often broken heart within and, for some, the bruises on their bodies, turning to shine a sincere smile on the face of a daughter or son while the phone rings about the overdue bills and the hamster cage screams for a cleaning and the schedule at work clamors beneath it all. This is goddess. It isn’t pretty as much as it’s courageous, resilient, vulnerable, and oh so amazing.

I had the privilege of coming home to a crazy kitten yowling out for love and kids grabbing for one more hug after a whole day of standing, coaching, holding a head up that could barely raise itself off the labor and delivery bed and all I could think was how amazing, how absolutely amazing our lives, the women who keep on day after day and continue to sing, to smile, to be real about what hurts while hoping and planning for brighter days. This is real life with goddess…