Starting the process for filing for absolute divorce today and we’re both seeing it as time, no ripples or obstructions. I’ve been appreciating runes of late and got Sowelu for today’s big decision. Suffice to say the sun and the goddess Sol inhabit much of the meaning in that particular rune. So, the image I got AI to come up with for how I’m feeling is shared here along with my commentary about divorce and relationships and love.
In short, it’s clear to me that the final decree means everything and sets everyone free so the best iterations of agency, prosperity and love beyond the milestone can grow in each life. Relationships don’t always do what you think they’ll do, just to be simplistic in my assessment. Love changes and the love I had for the husband of my youth is now the love I feel for the co-parent and brother I know and appreciate. We’re grateful for and to each other on a lot of levels especially given our commitment to be under the same roof long enough to be there for the needs of our precious, complicated and beautiful, neurofantastic children. And love itself…it defies all the rational, ideological and practical notions, sustains and sometimes crashes lives into new manifestations of being human. Love transports people across space and time, emboldening, encouraging, embiggening and empowering life to thrive, create and renew purpose. I would not be where I am or who I am at this point on my path had love not turned me upside down, inside out and spun me completely, while also constantly nurturing my soul in the various beautiful forms and iterations love embodies.
There’s not much of a safety net that I can actually see in my life beyond this point besides the ongoing kindness in the bond with my beloved family, the amazing family of my soul, precious friends and the father of my children. I’ve decided that is more than sufficient. Vastly so.
Onward…
J. Ruth Kelly 
Wow. This is a gutsy Blog post. Good luck!
It’s life, you know? I’ve lived in the “only technically married” limbo purgatory for a long time. This finality is much needed on all fronts. We’re, everyone connected with our story & everyone coming from our story (our kids), are all so happy. Thank you for the kind wishes!
That’s such a healthy, loving and lovely way of looking at your situation. I’m in awe that the two of you have made it work for so long. We should all be that agreeable, flexible, and passionate about the people we love. Thanks for sharing your story!
Ah Dan… so grateful you’ve responded here and have read this post. Life has some interesting twists and turns. This one just had a longer arc than any of us expected! 😀 And our kids are worth the investment. We brought them into this mad world. Least we can do is everything(!) to help their launching with confidence and hope. We weren’t able to do it any other way. Your presence means so much to me! Oxo
Selfless love is such a rare thing nowadays. I’m so glad (but not really surprised) it worked out so well for you and your family. Y’all are something special!
🥰